There’s nothing like a good sunset sail to get some snorkeling in, see the ocean, and catch a few rays. But after going on one too many of these sunset cruises out of Tamarindo, I started to recognize a pattern of some of the characters that frequent the high seas off of Tamarindo.

1. The obsessive instagrammer

A photo posted by Yasmin Oweidah (@yasmin.jaz) on


You’re the only one to miss the green flash on the way back because you were busy deciding if X-Pro II or Valencia made your butt look better. Put down the selfie stick!

2. The drunk

A photo posted by Kashmir (@keepinitkash) on


Yes, we all know this cruise was $85 and you are for sure gonna get your money’s worth in guaro shots and “magic” punch, but nothing ruins a sunset cruise or the chance of seeing dolphins like puke trails over the bow.

3. The German


If you’re name is not Michael Phelps, you should NOT be in a Speedo. End. of. story.

4. The lobster


Who told you this would be a good idea? You got burned on the FIRST DAY of your vacation, yet here you are, out in the sun AGAIN with your burned skin as a reminder to the entire boat that you are still not a functioning adult yet.

5. The “need to get a room” honeymoon couple


The tour company promised this cruise would take you to a private beach. While technically that is true, this “private” beach is currently being shared by 80 other people so PLEASE for the sake of the children keep it PG-13!

 

Do you have any other “characters” you’ve encountered on sunset cruises? Share them in the comments below. 

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